Episode 2x14 - "The Immaculate Election"
Director: Anthony Russo, Joe Russo
Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything...
00:01 - 00:04
and the one son who had no choice...
00:04 - 00:06
but to keep them all together.
00:06 - 00:08
It's Arrested Development.
00:14 - 00:15
Michael was surprised to find the house...
00:18 - 00:20
still a mess a week after the fumigation.
00:20 - 00:22
You still haven't put this stuff back yet? You've got to be the laziest person in the world.
00:22 - 00:27
If you weren't all the way on the other side of the room, I'd slap your face.
00:27 - 00:30
- I asked you to clean this up. - Yeah, and you also asked me to call the fumigators...
00:31 - 00:34
and you haven't even thanked me for doing that.
00:34 - 00:36
Michael had asked her to do this, but that was long before...
00:36 - 00:39
he began hiding his fugitive father in the attic.
00:40 - 00:42
What? Uh- Oh, God.
00:42 - 00:46
Polly, cover your mouth!
00:46 - 00:49
Luckily, Michael was notified in time.
00:49 - 00:53
Well, we had a deal, you know. I'd pay for everything, and you'd clean the house.
00:53 - 00:57
- And you've only done it once. - She hadn't even done it that time...
00:57 - 01:00
but instead, intercepted her mother's housekeeper...
01:00 - 01:03
- as she was arriving for work. - Can I take you the rest of the way?
01:03 - 01:05
- Mrs.- Mrs.- - Oh, I have to make one quick stop first.
01:05 - 01:10
Almost done. Yours or mister's?
01:10 - 01:15
Mister's.
01:15 - 01:17
Lupe never accepted a ride from Lindsay again.
01:17 - 01:20
Well, I'm sorry, Michael, but Tobias moving out hasn't been easy.
01:20 - 01:24
For any of us.
01:24 - 01:26
You didn't even notice he'd gone, did you?
01:26 - 01:28
I did notice we'd stopped TiVoing The Christopher Lowell Show.
01:28 - 01:30
- What happened? - I tried to give it one last chance.
01:31 - 01:34
- Like what you see? - I've been looking for those.
01:34 - 01:37
- You're gonna stretch them out. - That's all you can say?
01:37 - 01:40
Well, excuse me for liking the way they shape my junk.
01:40 - 01:43
You can pack your junk and get out.
01:46 - 01:50
You're kicking me out? At the beginning of pilot season?
01:50 - 01:53
You're not gonna make it as an actor, and we're not gonna make it as a couple.
01:53 - 01:57
With nowhere to go, Tobias went to the studio...
01:57 - 02:00
where he'd occasionally worked as a security guard and took up residence...
02:00 - 02:04
in the apartment of Detective Frank Wrench, on the set of the television show...
02:04 - 02:08
Wrench.
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I'm really sorry to hear that. How's Maeby taking it?
02:10 - 02:13
- Well, she's really hard to read. - You haven't told her yet.
02:13 - 02:17
Well, she was so excited the hot water in the shower was lasting longer.
02:17 - 02:19
How could I have the heart to tell her it's because her father moved out?
02:19 - 02:22
Tobias moved out?
02:22 - 02:26
- Did he take the good video camera with him? - That's touching.
02:26 - 02:29
- What do you need the camera for? - I'm making a magic video.
02:30 - 02:33
I'm gonna tape myself doing tricks around the office.
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I'm calling it Tricks- Let me finish- around the Office.
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I figured out a way to make money while I'm working.
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That is what we call working. Something you might wanna try next time you're at the office.
02:42 - 02:46
Incidentally, today we're having a big vote on that building renovation.
02:50 - 02:52
- I need you there to help me vote it in. - Fine. I'll vote...
02:52 - 02:55
as long as you give me the camera.
02:55 - 02:57
I think we all know that George Michael was using it last.
02:57 - 03:00
A fact the family had discovered when they'd gathered to watch a home video.
03:00 - 03:04
Was that a 40th anniversary party, huh? Didn't cost us a thing.
03:04 - 03:08
Is that Qusay Hussein at the omelet bar?
03:08 - 03:11
Look at this. If these guys move, they don't get paid.
03:11 - 03:14
It seems that as a 13-year-old, George Michael had been...
03:16 - 03:19
- You're not my father! You'll never be! - I spent $2.1 million...
03:25 - 03:28
of good company money and end up with this?
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You cut off my hand! Worth every penny.
03:31 - 03:33
Even you have to admit that that was the lamest thing ever put on tape.
03:33 - 03:37
Not so. Buster had once videotaped himself...
03:37 - 03:40
His self-esteem is low enough as it is, and I have no idea why.
03:51 - 03:54
I mean, he's such a great kid, and everybody loves him. He's George Michael!
03:54 - 03:57
Truthfully, that's why I'm not that crazy about that Ann, but he'll move on.
03:57 - 04:02
Unless he knocks her up like you did with his mother. Plus, she's religious.
04:02 - 04:06
If that one gets pregnant, it stays pregnant.
04:06 - 04:09
No, I didn't.
04:13 - 04:16
I gotta work on that boy's self-esteem.
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Michael went to do so, only to hear Ann beating him to it.
04:20 - 04:23
- I want you to do it. - I don't think I'm ready.
04:23 - 04:25
- Of course you are. - I'm gonna lose it before I start.
04:25 - 04:27
Don't start!
04:27 - 04:30
Smoking. It's a killer. That Sammy Davis Jr. Should still be performing.
04:30 - 04:34
- What's going on? - Ann thinks I should run for student body president.
04:34 - 04:37
- That's a great idea. - Well, I don't have a chance.
04:37 - 04:40
- They only vote for the cool kids. - But everyone loves you.
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You are George Michael! Who's cooler than you?
04:43 - 04:45
Plus, you would be following in your old man's footsteps.
04:48 - 04:50
- You were student body president? - Oh-ho.
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- It was close. - So you lost.
04:52 - 04:55
- Who remembers? - I know I would remember.
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Ann, if my dad says that he won, then he won.
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Didn't say I won. Said I can't remember.
04:59 - 05:01
But now that we're thinking about it, I seem to remember the other guy won the title...
05:01 - 05:06
although there were plenty in the school who wanted to overturn the decision.
05:06 - 05:09
I said, "Let's- Do not- Let's not put the school through that."
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Haven't thought about that for years. Good memory.
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Well, anyway, I'll help you run your campaign and make your commercial for election day.
05:16 - 05:20
Well, that's great. The important thing is...
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to raise the old self-esteem and not to rush a physical relationship.
05:23 - 05:28
- Those are really the two important things. - No. We're both waiting.
05:29 - 05:32
- Good. - And then that first time, after waiting and waiting-
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It's gonna be so awesome, because it's not just gonna be my love and George Michael's...
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but God's love as well.
05:40 - 05:42
- God, it's gonna be incredible. - All right. I'll do it. I'm in.
05:42 - 05:46
- Campaign? - I'm pumped.
05:46 - 05:48
As George Michael was on the path to higher self-esteem...
05:48 - 05:51
Buster was losing what little he had.
05:51 - 05:54
I can't put the aorta in with this thing.
05:54 - 05:56
Oh, stop complaining.
05:56 - 05:59
- Buster! - I'm sorry I'm an inconvenience to you, Mother.
05:59 - 06:03
Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh!
06:03 - 06:08
As Lupe felt sorry...
06:08 - 06:11
for Buster's loss of a hand, Lindsay felt sorry for her loss of Lupe.
06:11 - 06:16
Lindsay had cleaned one room and now had a garbage problem.
06:30 - 06:33
And while looking for a spot to stash the refuse...
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She came upon an old friend.
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I haven't seen this in ages. EBay.
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Unfortunately, it was a new friend to George Sr.
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Polly!
06:46 - 06:49
Back at the office, Michael came to regret having given Gob the video camera.
06:49 - 06:54
Well, I certainly appreciate your decision...
06:54 - 06:56
but if my brother was here, we could've voted this thing through.
06:56 - 06:59
What's this? A stuffy office meeting?
06:59 - 07:03
Well, maybe it's time for a little... Office Magic.
07:03 - 07:07
- What's "office magic"? - Sometimes it's as simple as turning 10:45...
07:08 - 07:13
in the morning into lunchtime!
07:13 - 07:17
- Okay. - Why does lunch have to be so dull?
07:17 - 07:20
Maybe you'd prefer some chicken instead!
07:20 - 07:25
All right. Let's cut. Take five, everybody.
07:25 - 07:28
- No, no. We're not takin' five. Hey, is this guy with you? - Yeah, he's an actor.
07:28 - 07:32
Well, you know, I thought he was an investor. He voted against me...
07:32 - 07:35
which is the vote I asked you to be here for, so-
07:35 - 07:37
You know what? I don't know why, but that's it. I don't think I can work with you anymore.
07:38 - 07:41
- You kind of have to, guy. I'm the president. - No. I'm the president.
07:41 - 07:44
No. You lost the presidency, just like you did in high school when you refused to play dirty.
07:44 - 07:48
- Worked when I ran. - We're talkin' about the office here, okay?
07:48 - 07:50
I do all the work. I've been helping you. That's over now.
07:51 - 07:53
Sorry to hear you say that, Michael, 'cause it just cost you your job.
07:53 - 07:57
- I'm serious. It's over. - How do you call Security on this thing?
07:57 - 07:59
- You hit pound-zero-zero to operate the system. - Pound is tic-tac-toe, right?
07:59 - 08:03
- Yeah. Pound is right- - When I keep hitting that, the other thing flashes.
08:03 - 08:05
- Hit pound and then zero-zero. - I do. I know.
08:05 - 08:08
Tell you what. You don't need to learn the system, because you're out of here.
08:08 - 08:11
You're fired.
08:11 - 08:13
Have Security send a man up.
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You've got the wrong guy.
08:16 - 08:18
Uh, no, you don't, but you don't have to do this.
08:18 - 08:21
But the guard had recently lost halfhis tie to Office Magic.
08:21 - 08:25
- Oh, I don't mind. - Get this. You getting this?
08:25 - 08:28
Cheat out. You have to cheat out a little bit.
08:28 - 08:31
- Oh, hey. - What was that all about?
08:31 - 08:34
Your uncle doesn't not-work here anymore.
08:34 - 08:37
- So I guess your mom told you about your dad moving out, huh? - No, she did not tell me that.
08:37 - 08:41
- Oh. - But she doesn't tell me anything.
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- Neither of them do. - Sorry. Guess I shouldn't have said anything.
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Maybe I should just start keeping some secrets of my own.
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Why aren't you at school right now?
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Marry me.
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I'm so sorry. I forgot who I was talking to.
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I was just using your copier to make some campaign posters.
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Well, then, by all means, let me help you out.
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I mean, I don't even know why I'm doing it. He's gonna win by a landslide.
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- That's what I was tellin' him. - How do you know Steve Holt?
09:07 - 09:10
- Are you in A.A.? - I was talkin' about George Michael.
09:10 - 09:12
He's running for student body president. Who's Steve Holt?
09:12 - 09:14
He's just the hottest guy in school. And he's won three years in a row-
09:15 - 09:18
every year after his first junior year.
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So, then, he's more popular than George Michael?
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Well, that's like comparing apples and some fruit nobody's ever heard of.
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He might even finish after the Indian kid.
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I guess I gotta get down to the school and see if I can stop him from signing up, huh?
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Yes. You have to. And do you think you could put up a couple of these when you're there...
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'cause I was really not in the mood to go down there.
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Michael went to take care ofhis son...
09:40 - 09:44
as Lucille discovered that hers was already being taken care of.
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Mother! - And yet you're too good to polish the candlesticks?
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- You're fired! - You can't fire me. I'm your son.
09:53 - 09:55
- I'm firing you! - I was firing Lupe!
09:55 - 09:58
Well, that makes more sense.
09:58 - 10:00
- Lindsay came upon Lupe, who'd just been fired. - I no clean for family anymore.
10:03 - 10:06
Can't you at least come over and Dust Buster or something?
10:06 - 10:10
- I no does Buster anymore. - Fine.
10:10 - 10:13
I'll Dust Buster! God.
10:13 - 10:17
I'm in the bathroom of the Wrench set, and they've started shooting.
10:20 - 10:23
Also, I don't think this is a real toilet.
10:23 - 10:27
So I just wanted to check on Maeby and tell you that I haven't landed a part yet...
10:27 - 10:31
but despite what you may think, my talent shall win out.
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Well, Maeby's fine. We've been looking for a cleaning lady, so if you hear of one-
10:35 - 10:39
Shh- Shh. - ... dirty cop, so Frank Wrench is gonna clean ya.
10:39 - 10:41
- Why is this door locked? - Cut!
10:42 - 10:44
- Is somebody using the set bathroom? - I gotta go.
10:45 - 10:48
Michael arrived at school to talk his son out of running for office.
10:48 - 10:52
It took me all day, but I got the 10 signatures. I'm running for student body president.
10:52 - 10:55
- Listen, George Michael- - We're gonna use your idea and highlight being chaste.
10:55 - 11:00
I just meant you two shouldn't- You're not gonna put up this poster, are you?
11:01 - 11:04
It's really gonna appeal to the Christian crowd.
11:05 - 11:08
I couldn't have done this without you guys. I'm gonna win this thing.
11:08 - 11:10
Four more years! Four more years!
11:10 - 11:15
Four more years! Four more years!
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And Gob showed up at his mother's.
11:18 - 11:20
- Well, guess who's been fired. - Michael fired you?
11:21 - 11:24
No. I fired him. As a result, I'm no longer welcome in the office.
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What a coincidence. I just fired my housekeeper...
11:28 - 11:31
but I've already found a replacement.
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It's a robot.
11:33 - 11:36
- I hate it. I miss Lupe. - No. I won't let you go down that road.
11:36 - 11:40
I want you to be strong, and you don't need the comfort of an immigrant...
11:41 - 11:44
in Mother's old stirrup pants to make you feel that way.
11:44 - 11:46
Oh.
11:48 - 11:49
Ohh, you're hungry.
11:50 - 11:53
Lindsay was about to find a replacement for Lupe as well. - Who is it?
11:53 - 11:57
The new housekeeper. The agency sent me over.
11:57 - 12:00
I'm sorry. I didn't call any-
12:00 - 12:02
Oh, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Phyllidia Featherbottom...
12:02 - 12:08
and I can cook and I can clean and I can take care of the little ones.
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I can also sing a song or two, if it comes in handy.
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When you put a squirt of frosting on your throat
12:18 - 12:22
Before we take our medications
12:22 - 12:24
Tobias had gained access to the studio's wardrobe and makeup department.
12:24 - 12:29
He was eager to both see his daughter...
12:29 - 12:31
and prove to his wife that he had what it took to be an actor.
12:31 - 12:35
- It was the exact plot of the film Mrs. Doubtfire. - In the most delicious way
12:35 - 12:40
There was also some Mary Poppins in there. - Let's get this house cleaned.
12:40 - 12:44
Hey. Lindsay, the place looks fantastic.
12:44 - 12:48
- What? Did you pay somebody to do this? - Oh, I've no need for payment.
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The love of the family is more than enough.
12:53 - 12:55
I'm sorry. This is Mrs. Featherbottom.
12:56 - 12:59
From Blackstone. I'm charmed, I'm sure.
12:59 - 13:01
Ooh!
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Back to work.
13:05 - 13:07
- I think he misses his daughter. - That's convenient...
13:07 - 13:10
considering you didn't even have the courage to tell Maeby that he'd moved out.
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I'm sorry. I'm not the perfect parent, like you.
13:14 - 13:16
I'm not that perfect. I pushed George Michael into running for office...
13:16 - 13:19
and I think he's gonna get crushed by this kid Steve Holt.
13:19 - 13:22
Yeah. I'd vote for Steve. Too bad Dad's on the lam.
13:22 - 13:26
You could finally use some of his dirty tricks to get George Michael elected.
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As it happens, George Sr. Had come to...
13:31 - 13:33
in the attic, and perhaps it was the effect oflosing his one friend-
13:33 - 13:37
- Polly? - or the lingering effects of the fumigation-
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or perhaps it really was divine intervention-
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but he'd had a profound realization.
13:43 - 13:47
Unfortunately, the timing of the enlightenment wasn't ideal for Michael.
13:50 - 13:54
- That's why I need your help. - "Our Heavenly Father let his son die...
13:54 - 13:58
so that our sins could be absolved."
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- Great. So you're a Christian now. - "We must all seek forgiveness."
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Well, I'll call the warden for you. You can ask him yourself.
14:05 - 14:07
Well, I think that's for fresh crimes. Besides, you've always tried to lead a clean life.
14:07 - 14:13
You and Gob were like those biblical brothers, Gallant and, um-
14:13 - 14:18
"Goofuth."
14:18 - 14:20
Michael realized he had lived like Gallant...
14:20 - 14:24
and ifhe wanted to help his son's election...
14:24 - 14:26
he would have to find... Goofuth.
14:26 - 14:28
- Been lookin' all over for you, pal. - If you came to grovel...
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for the job of president, you're too late.
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- My brother already fired me. - Listen, I'm really sorry that I got upset with you...
14:33 - 14:38
you know, and I never meant to, um- I didn't even mean to fire you.
14:38 - 14:42
You know, and I never meant to, um- I didn't even mean to fire you.
14:42 - 14:44
You know? I just got so frustrated, and, Gob, you are my brother.
14:44 - 14:48
- Of course I'm gonna support you. - Well...
14:48 - 14:52
now I feel bad for firing you.
14:52 - 14:54
Listen, George Michael is running for student body president...
14:54 - 14:58
and I have a feeling he's gonna get slaughtered.
14:58 - 15:00
The guy he's running against is basically a young you.
15:00 - 15:03
Wow. It won't be easy to win a race against myself.
15:03 - 15:08
- Of course, if anyone can do it, I can. - That's right.
15:08 - 15:11
- I wish I was 15 years younger. - He doesn't need to beat him.
15:11 - 15:15
- He just needs to beat the Indian kid. - If I do this, you'll rehire me?
15:15 - 15:18
- Of course I will. - The mere fact that you think you can...
15:19 - 15:21
says to me that I shouldn't let you.
15:21 - 15:25
Course, we both need the work.
15:25 - 15:29
Robot'll get it.
15:29 - 15:31
Where the hell is my maid? Robot!
15:31 - 15:34
But the robot was busy elsewhere.
15:34 - 15:37
What do you expect, Mother? I'm half machine!
15:40 - 15:44
I'm a monster!
15:45 - 15:48
Michael brought Gob in to consult on his son's campaign.
15:56 - 15:59
Focus on the video and shy away from the virgin thing.
15:59 - 16:03
Oh, we should definitely sacrifice the whole virgin thing.
16:03 - 16:06
And I got the perfect way.
16:06 - 16:08
We hand out rubbers that say, "We salute George Michael."
16:08 - 16:12
- We're not supposed to have help. - I don't wanna make Steve look bad.
16:12 - 16:15
Yeah, I just don't want my son to be embarrassed up there. Let's not play too dirty.
16:15 - 16:18
- Uh, good point, two percent. - Two percent, huh? Is that how little I lost by?
16:18 - 16:22
- Lost by? That's all you got. - Not really important.
16:22 - 16:24
Well, if your son wants more than two percent, he's gonna have to go after Steve Holt.
16:24 - 16:28
So I want you to tell me every awful rumor you've ever heard about this kid.
16:28 - 16:32
I can't support this, and neither can the Christian kids...
16:32 - 16:35
- that were gonna make you president. - Uh-
16:35 - 16:37
Ann? I think she's really upset about this.
16:38 - 16:40
She'll forgive ya. You're George Michael.
16:41 - 16:44
Meanwhile...
16:44 - 16:47
Maeby was meeting her new singing nanny.
16:47 - 16:49
Now. Take your Fun-fun.
16:49 - 16:52
This is my mom's, and it's fen-phen, and it's been banned by the F.D.A.
16:52 - 16:56
Oh! Well. You should always read the label
16:56 - 17:01
You should always read it well in the most delicious way
17:01 - 17:05
- Mr. Fingerbottom? - Mrs.
17:05 - 17:07
Right. Mrs. I should really get going.
17:07 - 17:09
No, no, no, no, no. Sit back. What's the rush? Please.
17:09 - 17:13
I wanna hear about you. Tell me about your family.
17:13 - 17:16
I'm sure wherever your father is right now, she loves you very, very much.
17:16 - 17:20
Not enough to be honest with me.
17:20 - 17:23
And after a few days, Gob was ready...
17:26 - 17:28
to unveil George Michael's new message.
17:28 - 17:31
Drought, starvation-
17:31 - 17:34
These are the things my family has had to deal with for generations...
17:34 - 17:38
although, fortunately, not since we moved to Corona del Mar.
17:38 - 17:41
Go home, you terrorist!
17:41 - 17:45
How stupid do you have to be to say something like that?
17:45 - 17:48
- You're not wanted here! - Gob.
17:48 - 17:51
- Michael. - You got George Michael's tape?
17:51 - 17:54
Yeah. I gave it to the tech guy. Don't worry. It's very tastefully done.
17:54 - 17:58
Sure you didn't make that video in a cave?
17:58 - 18:01
- Perennial candidate Steve Holt! - Soon it was time...
18:01 - 18:04
for Steve Holt to play his video...
18:04 - 18:06
which had been produced by his new campaign manager, Ann Veal.
18:06 - 18:09
- Hi. I'm Steve Holt. - Evil!
18:10 - 18:14
This kid's popular?
18:14 - 18:17
Looks like a chick I did once in high school.
18:17 - 18:20
Get a haircut!
18:20 - 18:22
Recently, I've been dealing with the fact that I've never known my father...
18:22 - 18:25
but I finally found a new Father.
18:25 - 18:29
You're probably wondering what these footsteps are.
18:29 - 18:32
Well, this is my second take. It's kind of like a second chance at making good.
18:32 - 18:37
Yeah. Okay. We need to pull the videotape.
18:40 - 18:43
- My tape? - Why? - I've made a huge mistake.
18:43 - 18:46
But it was too late to do anything about it.
18:46 - 18:50
Steve Holt is a bastard. He doesn't even know who his real father is.
18:50 - 18:54
What else don't we know about Steve Holt?
18:54 - 18:59
George Michael Bluth is a cool guy.
18:59 - 19:02
His dad is a powerful executive working for this man.
19:02 - 19:06
The girls like him just fine. Young and old. It doesn't matter.
19:06 - 19:10
- In the dark. - That's why you had me do that?
19:10 - 19:13
George Michael had never been more embarrassed.
19:13 - 19:16
Until this part.
19:16 - 19:19
I couldn't find another tape.
19:19 - 19:21
I like Steve's more.
19:27 - 19:30
Guess I underestimated the religious vote.
19:31 - 19:34
- So Steve won? - No. Steve dropped out of the race.
19:34 - 19:37
He says he wants to spend some time trying to find his real father.
19:37 - 19:40
Rav Nadir, the Indian kid, he got 97% of the vote.
19:40 - 19:43
Well, that leaves three percent. You did better than I did when I ran.
19:43 - 19:48
I tied with Bart Simpson and "School Sucks."
19:48 - 19:50
I'm really sorry, buddy. Believe it or not, I did this...
19:51 - 19:53
because I didn't want you to feel bad about yourself.
19:53 - 19:55
Hey, it's Star Dork.
19:55 - 19:58
Hey, he knows you now. I'm really sorry, buddy.
19:58 - 20:01
It's just a drag. I mean, I'm pretty sure my girlfriend's gone forever...
20:01 - 20:05
and I never wanted to do this in the first place.
20:05 - 20:07
George Michael, was that really you doing those lightsaber moves?
20:07 - 20:13
- You were incredible. - I've only gotten better.
20:13 - 20:16
You're still doin' that?
20:16 - 20:19
So, you wanna grab a curtain rod and go over to my place?
20:19 - 20:24
Wow. I'd love that. Thanks, Ann.
20:24 - 20:27
You really make me feel good about myself.
20:27 - 20:30
Gotta do something about that kid's self-esteem.
20:33 - 20:37
On the next Arrested Development.
20:37 - 20:39
Yoo-hoo! I'll take you the rest of the way!
20:42 - 20:44
Lucille finds a housekeeper that she won't lose her son to.
20:44 - 20:48
Always keep from crying even though your heart is dying
20:48 - 20:53
And Steve Holt finally tracks down his real father.
20:59 - 21:02
I've been wonderin' my whole life who he is-
21:02 - 21:05
a scientist, a doctor, a senator?
21:05 - 21:08
Well, we got some bad news.
21:08 - 21:11
Wow. Is that what's gonna happen to my hair?
21:11 - 21:15