Episode 2x6 - "Afternoon Delight"
Director: Jason Bateman
Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything...
00:01 - 00:04
and the one son who had no choice...
00:04 - 00:06
but to keep them all together.
00:06 - 00:08
It's Arrested Development.
00:14 - 00:15
Michael was using the Bluth Company crane...
00:18 - 00:21
to retrieve the family-owned frozen banana stand after it had been dumped in the bay...
00:21 - 00:26
a holiday tradition among the local youth.
00:26 - 00:28
- Soon he returned home so that he and his son- - George Michael?
00:29 - 00:32
Could share their holiday tradition of rebuilding it.
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- Another one of Dad's suits? - Hey, I'm the president now.
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I'm filling Dad's shoes... literally, except his shoes don't fit.
00:38 - 00:42
But I did finally get into Dad's pants...
00:42 - 00:44
although I had to have the crotch taken in a little.
00:44 - 00:47
You know, Gob, maybe it's the suits, but I think you may be beginning...
00:47 - 00:50
to alienate some of the employees down at work.
00:50 - 00:53
What? Oh, that's great.
00:53 - 00:56
The president has to worry about alienating the employees now.
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In fact, Gob had started to alienate some ofhis colleagues.
01:00 - 01:03
The worst that could happen is I could spill some on my $3,000 suit. Come on!
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- Hey! - The guy in the $4,000 suit...
01:08 - 01:11
is holding the elevator for the guy who doesn't make that in three months.
01:11 - 01:14
Why don't I just take a whiz through this $5,000 suit?
01:16 - 01:18
Come on! They like me just fine. You'll see that tonight...
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when they toast me at the Christmas party, just like they used to with Dad.
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Hey, nobody laughed louder than me at any joke about Dad.
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You're the one who's all Mr. "I take myself too seriously all the time."
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Michael did tend to take the Christmas party somewhat seriously.
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Merry Christmas. You can go ahead and put that right in the charity barrel.
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Thanks a lot. Sorry, pal. We just can't have them resent us.
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I know some of the numbers haven't all added up, and there is some speculation...
01:47 - 01:51
that George has been into the kitty-
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"Into the kitty"! That's awesome.
01:55 - 01:58
Fire Tom and get your jackass brother out of here.
01:58 - 02:01
This year I'm not officially president, and it'll be nice to actually have some fun...
02:02 - 02:05
with my son at a Christmas party.
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- Thank God I don't have to go. - So glad to hear you say that.
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I wanna meet someone there.
02:11 - 02:12
What? So I'm not invited to the Bluth Company Christmas party?
02:12 - 02:15
Oh, honey, of course you can go if you want to.
02:15 - 02:18
- Thanks, Mom. - No. You're not going to that.
02:19 - 02:22
You see, if I show up with you, it'll just make me seem like I'm a mother.
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- I've never thought of you that way. - That's sweet.
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Well, I won't be going. I will be head to toe in blue makeup until 8:01...
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in case the Blue Man Group needs their understudy, so-
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No, no, you have to go. So when men find out...
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we're in an open relationship, they'll see you're no threat.
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People hear the name Tobias, they think big, black guy.
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Well, obviously I'm not a big guy.
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I'm not a Carl Weathers, par exemple.
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I forgot about Carl. Is he still single?
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Hey, George Michael, I need you to help me fix up the banana stand.
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No, I can't. I was supposed to go to Ann's parents' Christmas party.
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- We're makin' yams. - Tonight? Tonight is the office party.
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Well, did you want me to go to that? You're always telling me not to have fun at those things.
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Yes. We might even snatch a gift from the charity barrel.
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Oh. Okay, well-well, I think Ann's parents are having their party on Bethlehem time...
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which is pretty early, so maybe I can make an appearance.
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Make an appearance? Uh- Uh- No, no. It's okay.
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- You be with Yam. It's fine. It's good. - It's Ann.
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It's good. Have fun.
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The boy's pulling away from you. Are we having yams?
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Yeah, I don't know what's goin' on with him. You know, he's on Bethlehem time.
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He's spending every moment of the day with this girl.
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- It's, like, I'm his father. He should be spending most- - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
03:35 - 03:38
Don't get involved. Believe me. When I thought your first wife was driving us apart...
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I did not make a stink.
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You complained all the time, and she was my only wife. And she died.
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Well, see, things have a way of working themselves out.
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Nonetheless, it's family first at the holidays.
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- Oh, God. It's Mom again. - Put it on speakerphone.
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I wanna hear her beautiful voice.
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Michael! There's a hole in the window! There's been a break-in!
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- Get over here! - I'm leaving now.
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Sounds tense.
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That means she's not gettin' any from my brother, Oscar. Lovely. That's nice.
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I heard about the banana stand, and now there's been a break-in.
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But I have a surprise for whoever it is if he comes back.
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First I blow him; then I poke him.
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Guy has no idea what he's in for.
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You know, Mom, all the glass seems to be on the outside. Plus, here's your little statue...
04:27 - 04:32
so I guess what this says to me is, I doubt anyone was trying to break in, Mom.
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If anything, someone was trying to break out. Where is Oscar?
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Well, he's on his walkabout or pilgrimage.
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Every year, Oscar attempts the 420-mile walk...
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from Newport Beach to Berkeley, California.
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In the 12 years he's attempted this...
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he's never made it past U.C. Irvine.
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He calls it a quest to recharge his chi. I call it an excuse for him...
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to score his pot and wag his pickle at coeds.
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You sound mad, Mom, mad enough to throw one of these little lady heads at him.
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- What's that supposed to mean? - Well, maybe you're a little bit lonely...
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and you're acting out for attention.
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That's ridiculous. I want you to move in with me.
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What? No. No. No. No, no, no, no.
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Didn't you adopt a child for this very reason? So that you would never be alone?
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Michael, a mother doesn't have a child to give herself company.
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- Annyong was to teach Buster a lesson. - And where is that little lesson?
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I sent him to the Milford Academy to teach him a lesson. I can't remember about what.
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And Buster left this morning to finish his army training.
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In fact, Lucille had refused to drive him to the army base...
05:38 - 05:42
so Buster was taking his very first bus ride.
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- I can't change a hundred. - Oh.
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Oh, God. Oh.
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And that's when Buster saw something interesting.
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That could be good for army.
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Whilejust 20 yards away, Michael went to work repairing the banana stand.
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What are you doin' here?
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My mom signed me out of school early, so she wouldn't have to pick me up later...
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so she wouldn't be late for the Christmas party.
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- That's about the worst thing I've ever heard. - I had to drive...
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- because she had a little bit of a buzz on. - No. That's it.
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- You doing this alone? - Yeah. Well, thanks.
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I guess George Michael's gettin' a little too old to hang out with his dad.
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- Yeah, and I'm getting too old for my mom to be with me. - You know what?
06:29 - 06:32
- Maybe we should go to this party together. - Really?
06:32 - 06:34
Yeah. You're my little niece. I think we should be spending more time together.
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- And if it makes my mom jealous- - And George Michael can run back to his precious Ann.
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Great. Good deal.
06:42 - 06:44
Michael and Maeby stopped by the office to see if Gob needed help...
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for the party that was now hours away.
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...king $6,300 suit!
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- Come on! - Hi there.
07:01 - 07:03
- What's she doin' here? - Merry Christmas to you too, Uncle Gob.
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- Everything all right? - I just don't want people's kids getting their sticky fingers...
07:08 - 07:12
all over these $2,600 pants.
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Oh, yeah? You think they're gonna go right for the pants?
07:14 - 07:16
Okay, okay, okay. So, should- should- should- should, should, should-
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- Shh. - Should- should- should-
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We'll do it your way. I'm just here to have fun.
07:25 - 07:27
Not too much fun, all right? I already gave my big sexual harassment speech today.
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And please refrain from discussing or engaging...
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in any sort of interoffice-
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Or- Or finger-
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Or- fisting or-
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Or even- even though so many people in this office are begging for it.
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And if anybody does anything with my sister Lindsay...
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I'll take off my pants, I'll shave-
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And I'll personally-
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- Let's get this going. - What are you talking about?
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Now? You're not gonna let these people go home and change their clothes?
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I don't think we need people tryin' to compete with what I'm wearing.
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Everybody, come out of your offices, please. The party has now started.
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Here we go. Let's go.
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Everybody dance now.
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Everybody dance now.
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I think we're off to a great start.
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And so, Michael started to become relaxed, and a short time later...
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his mother arrived anything but.
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Someone broke in again. The liquor is gone. All of it- gone.
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In fact, Gob had stolen it earlier that day...
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to cut down on the cost of the party.
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- Hey, need a hand with that? - No, Al. I wanna spill booze all over my f-
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- I'm all alone there, Michael. - You know, Buster's only stationed about five miles away.
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In fact, Buster never went to the army.
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He'd gotten hooked playing the skill crane and missed his first day.
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- Somewhat ashamed and with nowhere to go, he returned home. - Hey, Buster.
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Buster!
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Thank God you're back! There's no shame in being a coward.
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A coward? I'm not a coward.
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- Would a coward have this? - What the hell is that?
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These are my awards, Mother, from army.
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The seal is for marksmanship...
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and the gorilla is for sand racing.
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- You're doing well? - I was just dropping these off.
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Now, if you'll excuse me, they're putting me in something called Hero Squad.
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You have no idea what it's like to be abandoned by your son.
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Do you see my son? He chose his girlfriend over me.
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How the worm has turned. Look who feels the sting of an ungrateful child.
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Mother, you have to receive something to be ungrateful.
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I'm not gettin' worked up over it tonight. I'm not gonna let anything bother me.
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Good. I'll get a drink and then go home and wait for you to come stay with me.
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Thank God they've got my brands here.
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This was an unacceptable solution.
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Hey, Tobias, it's Michael. I hope you get this. I need you to go over to my mother's tonight.
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Unfortunately, Tobias missed the call...
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and it went through to Michael's home voice mail.
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The Blue Men!
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You have 101 unheard messages. First message.
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- Michael, it's your mother- - Michael, pick up.
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Happy Thanksgiving- Michael, it's Mother-
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Michael, pick up-
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- Hey, Tobias, it's Michael. - Bluth Company.
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And Lindsay showed up at the Christmas party.
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Unfortunately, she didn't realize the employees had been threatened against flirting.
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Oh, hello, Ted. Oh, if you're worried about my husband, it's fine.
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He's no bigger than a Cub Scout. You could take him, and you could certainly take me.
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This has been pleasant and professional. Good luck in the coming business year.
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Hey, you guys are sticking stuff on Gob's suit? - Shh.
10:55 - 11:00
Go away. You're gonna ruin it.
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Aunt Lindsay, how's the party?
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It is the worst Christmas party I've ever been to in my life.
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Yeah. Watch this.
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Yep. Like my last 10 years. And my daughter won't give me the time of day.
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- How was your party? - Oh, it was good.
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They're kind of religious, Ann's family, so it was-
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Yeah, it was just kind of-
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The word George Michael was searching for was "creepy."
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Let me give you a hand with that, little fella.
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Hey, I was talkin' to the sound guy, and he said he's got this karaoke thing.
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- Yeah. Let's do it. Put the first song on in the book. - Okay.
11:51 - 11:54
Okay? Thanks very much. Hey. I thought you were at your party.
11:54 - 11:57
No, no. They said I could leave for the second hour of silent prayer.
11:57 - 11:59
But Ann and I do have to go back, so I should- I should go soon.
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- Uncle Michael- - Okay. I'll be right there.
12:03 - 12:05
Sorry. I gotta go do this. I'll be right back.
12:05 - 12:09
And Michael sang a duet with his niece.
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My daughter doesn't need me.
12:16 - 12:18
Neither does my dad.
12:18 - 12:20
Had George Michael and Lindsay stayed, they might have discovered...
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what Michael and Maeby did- that "Afternoon Delight"was more adult-themed...
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than its innocent melody would have you believe.
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- Hang on, Maeby.
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Listen. I'm gonna go get some more punch, because it is toast time.
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Okay? No, no, no. It'll look worse. Go that way.
12:45 - 12:50
So, let's toast me. Who's first?
12:50 - 12:53
Huh. Tom, why don't you come up here and talk about me for a few minutes?
12:53 - 12:58
Uh, I wanna thank the Bluth family for hiring me back.
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It's been a tough couple years.
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- My brother did that. Talk about me. - Oh, okay.
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Uh, you certainly do love those suits.
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At seven grand, you'd better believe I love 'em. I mean, look at what you're wearing.
13:11 - 13:15
You look like crap. I mean, at least this is-
13:15 - 13:19
Who did this?
13:19 - 13:21
You do this, Tom?
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- No. - You're a real smart-ass. You know that, Tom?
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Look, I don't know him very well...
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but Gob seems like he'd be a really smart boss.
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Please don't laugh.
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Look, he's a great magician.
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- That's even better! - you, Tom.
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- Please don't. - You know what? You're fired.
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No. You're all fired, each and every one of you.
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Merry Christmas.
13:50 - 13:53
I didn't know the lyrics. Where's everybody goin'?
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- We don't work here anymore. - What?
13:56 - 13:58
Is your sister still around?
13:58 - 14:01
The Christmas party had been a disaster.
14:05 - 14:08
I did the right thing, Michael. If I don't fire them, how do I teach a lesson to the others?
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- There are no others. You fired everyone. - Oh, that- that's great.
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The guy who's dirty dancing with his niece is gonna tell the guy in the $3,600 suit...
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- Come on. - I know. Maybe we're better off...
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with me being businesslike and you being the good-time, useless party guy.
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- It got us this far. - Mm-hmm.
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And I must say that I miss the laughter. Oh, God, how they used to laugh with me.
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At you. We gotta figure out a way to hire everybody back.
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- A meeting. - A party.
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- No. We just had a party. - Yeah, but I didn't get to have any fun.
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So Michael went to work on another Christmas party...
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this time with the help ofhis niece.
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I appreciate you doing this. I didn't wanna ask George Michael.
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Did you see that he showed up at the party for five minutes and left without saying good-bye?
14:55 - 14:59
- Hey, my mom doesn't even wanna be in the same room with me. - Michael...
14:59 - 15:03
I was almost attacked last night in my own home.
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I walk in, and there's a colored man in my kitchen.
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- "Colored"? What color was he exactly? - Blue.
15:08 - 15:11
Hello, Lucille.
15:13 - 15:15
- I sent him to your house to keep you safe. - Well, he did a terrible job.
15:17 - 15:20
Didn't he? I need someone else, someone better. What about this one? She's got thick arms.
15:20 - 15:25
Mom, you just need to calm down a little bit. You're so tense.
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How am I supposed to calm down?
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Sounds tense. That means she's not gettin' any from my brother Oscar.
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Maybe I should move in with you.
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And Michael realized he needed to retrieve his Uncle Oscar.
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How would you like to go on a road trip?
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No. I wanna stay here with her. Let's go.
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And so the two of them prepared to drive up the coast.
15:46 - 15:48
You're in charge of the radio, and we're not stopping until we find Uncle Oscar.
15:49 - 15:52
There he is.
15:53 - 15:56
My mom is very stressed out, and she needs something that I can't give her-
15:56 - 16:01
um, maybe a little afternoon delight.
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Oscar thought that Michael was referring to a particular brand of cannabis...
16:05 - 16:08
named Afternoon Deelite, a strain famous for slowing behavior.
16:08 - 16:13
Well, sure. The question is...
16:13 - 16:16
which way do I try to get it in her?
16:16 - 16:20
I don't need any details.
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- Maybe I'll put it in her brownie. - Hey!
16:22 - 16:25
- What happened to you? - What?
16:25 - 16:28
Oh, oh. My ears. The doctor said I can't go to sleep for five hours...
16:28 - 16:34
or I might die or something.
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Oh, I got blown, so I can't sleep.
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Hey, have you seen Maeby?
16:43 - 16:45
You're not gonna believe this. Apparently my dad and Maeby took a drive up the coast.
16:45 - 16:48
- You're kidding me. - Uh-oh. I should not have picked at that.
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- That's blood. - This is ridiculous.
16:52 - 16:54
- So she's got a new parent. - Yeah. Now my dad's got a new kid.
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I'm gonna lie down for a little bit, but just- I c- I can't fall-
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Hey, how would you like to come to the party with me today?
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And Oscar was giving Lucille a little Afternoon Deelite.
17:08 - 17:12
- These are really delicious. - I'll get some more.
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Okay
17:16 - 17:18
Mm-hmm
17:19 - 17:21
Where did she go?
17:21 - 17:24
Soon, the second Bluth Company Christmas party in as many days began.
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- You are not fired, sir. - I really appreciate that.
17:29 - 17:32
You got it. Here you go. Merry Christmas. Where the hell is my brother?
17:32 - 17:34
Sure, the guy in the $600 banana suit.
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- Come on! - Hi.
17:37 - 17:41
- What the hell are you doing? - Hey, don't be mad at me...
17:46 - 17:48
'cause you didn't think about going out to Tarzana...
17:48 - 17:50
to get the old banana suit out of storage.
17:50 - 17:52
But it's worth it, because it's time for me to make people laugh again.
17:52 - 17:56
With me.
17:56 - 17:58
And what's funnier than a guy in- Oh- Hey, wait. Hey.
17:58 - 18:02
Okay.
18:05 - 18:09
Later, Gob was inside the banana stand...
18:11 - 18:13
and it was getting pretty hot in there, so he decided to lose a layer.
18:13 - 18:17
Hey, look. There's your mom and George Michael. I guess they did come to support us after all.
18:17 - 18:22
Look at that. They're all over each other with their little secrets.
18:22 - 18:25
- What can you do, right? - Yeah.
18:25 - 18:28
How would you feel about singing a little karaoke?
18:28 - 18:31
Unfortunately, Lindsay wasn't there to see all of Michael and Maeby's song...
18:31 - 18:35
and was about to have a similar revelation.
18:35 - 18:37
Could not be caught that didn't bite
18:37 - 18:39
But you got some bait a-waitin', and I think I might
18:39 - 18:42
- Try nibbling a little afternoon delight - That's my wife and nephew.
18:42 - 18:45
- Skyrockets in flight - We have an open relationship.
18:45 - 18:49
Just then, Lucille arrived, craving a frozen banana.
18:49 - 18:54
And the effects of Lindsay and George Michael's "Afternoon Delight"was overshadowed-
18:54 - 18:58
- Mom? - by the effects of Oscar and Lucille's Afternoon Deelite.
18:58 - 19:02
- Tobias-Tobias, watch out. - Tobias couldn't hear-
19:02 - 19:05
- Tobias! - and didn't manage to get out of the way in time.
19:05 - 19:08
What the hell was that?
19:08 - 19:10
And Gob couldn't move freely. Lucille tried to stop...
19:10 - 19:14
but the car hit Gob's banana peel.
19:15 - 19:17
I can't get out of here. I'm stuck.
19:22 - 19:24
Mom, are you crazy? You could've killed somebody.
19:24 - 19:27
Hey, Mikey, relax. It's just a giant banana.
19:27 - 19:31
And that's when Buster saw an opportunity to be a hero.
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- Gob? - Mom, I'm stuck!
19:35 - 19:37
I got you, Brother!
19:37 - 19:40
And for the second time since he became president...
19:50 - 19:53
Gob heard the sweet sound oflaughter.
19:53 - 19:56
They're laughing with me, Michael. They're laughing with me!
19:56 - 20:02
Unfortunately, Buster's newfound skills...
20:02 - 20:05
did not involve lowering gently.
20:05 - 20:09
Ooh. Oh.
20:10 - 20:13
Hey, it's Tobias. Who wants to take me to the hospital?
20:16 - 20:20
And so father and son reunited...
20:20 - 20:22
rebuilding the banana stand for a second time.
20:23 - 20:25
- Hey. Can I give you a hand? - Hey. Yeah.
20:26 - 20:29
- That would be great. - Okay.
20:29 - 20:33
- Oh, I'm sorry about- It's embarrassing, the whole- - Listen, I, uh-
20:33 - 20:37
I've been a little out of line lately. You're entitled...
20:37 - 20:39
to be with your girlfriend, and I guess I got a little bit jealous.
20:40 - 20:42
- Yeah. Well, me too. - Yeah.
20:42 - 20:45
Okay.
20:45 - 20:48
- Gonna grab some afternoon- - Afternoon
20:54 - 20:57
- It does not seem like it would be that dirty. - It's- It is catchy.
20:57 - 21:00
Right. That's the thing.
21:00 - 21:01
On the next Arrested Development.
21:01 - 21:04
The Blue Man Group finally calls for Tobias...
21:04 - 21:07
With a life-changing opportunity.
21:07 - 21:11
Unfortunately, he can't hear it, and his life stays the same.
21:11 - 21:15