Episode 1x6 - "Visiting Ours"
Director: Greg Mottola
Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything...
00:01 - 00:04
and the one son who had no choice...
00:04 - 00:06
but to keep them all together.
00:06 - 00:08
Michael Bluth always rode his bike to work...
00:21 - 00:24
but the recent heat wave had taken some of the fun out of it.
00:24 - 00:26
It had also caused problems...
00:28 - 00:30
There's no screwups with the permits this time?
00:33 - 00:35
The permits have been filed absolutely on time.
00:35 - 00:38
You have my word on that.
00:38 - 00:40
Um, I'll tell you what.
00:42 - 00:44
Let me get some of this, uh...
00:44 - 00:47
Well, as you can... The important part is here.
00:47 - 00:49
- Bye, you guys. Really great to see you again. - Bye.
00:50 - 00:52
They think you're full of...
00:56 - 00:58
- I think it's the sweating. - I've gotta get a car.
00:58 - 01:01
Don't worry. I told them the truth.
01:01 - 01:04
- That I rode here on a bike? - That the permits weren't filed.
01:04 - 01:06
But my dad filed the permits before he went to jail.
01:06 - 01:10
He most certainly did not.
01:10 - 01:13
So, I just lied to the investors?
01:13 - 01:15
- You most certainly did. - That's really great.
01:15 - 01:17
Now I gotta ride my bike out to the prison and talk to my dad about this.
01:18 - 01:20
That'll be fun in 100-degree heat.
01:21 - 01:22
Why don't you take your dad's car?
01:23 - 01:25
No. Dad would never go for that.
01:25 - 01:29
No, no, no, no. There's no ice cream in the car.
01:29 - 01:33
- I'll be careful. - All right. This is what we're gonna do.
01:33 - 01:36
Careful, Michael.
01:36 - 01:38
Oh.
01:41 - 01:44
- Whatever you think. - Yeah.
01:47 - 01:49
But I did see Gob driving it last week.
01:49 - 01:51
Wait. Honestly, Gob's driving the car?
01:51 - 01:54
I'm not the liar.
01:54 - 01:57
Michael needed his father's car...
01:57 - 02:00
so he went to confront his brother Gob.
02:00 - 02:02
- Give me a Gob. - Gob!
02:02 - 02:05
No, I didn't mean for you to yell my name at me.
02:05 - 02:07
It's what I call a double-dipped banana with everything on it.
02:07 - 02:09
Hey, I can't believe you. I asked you two weeks ago...
02:09 - 02:12
whether we should use Dad's car, and you said it would be bad form.
02:12 - 02:15
- Now I hear you're driving it. - That is a lie, a bold-faced lie!
02:15 - 02:19
Gob was lying. He had been driving his father's car.
02:19 - 02:22
Why don't you just take your precious, portable...
02:37 - 02:39
stairway vehicle you're always trying to convince us is a car?
02:39 - 02:42
Yeah, that would be great, except our brother-in-law...
02:42 - 02:44
left it in an airport parking lot.
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From whence it came, huh?
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In fact, Tobias had intended to park the family's only vehicle...
02:48 - 02:51
at the airport parking lot...
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but was waved on to the tarmac instead...
02:53 - 02:56
where he found a spot close to his gate.
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Here you go, Uncle Gob. I had to use two sticks...
03:01 - 03:03
to support all the extra chocolate and nuts.
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Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Whoa. Two sticks and extra chocolate?
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Is it Mardi Gras? What are you charging for that?
03:08 - 03:10
- He doesn't like to discuss money. - I don't like to discuss money.
03:10 - 03:13
- You don't pay for it? - A Bluth banana? No, I hadn't planned on it.
03:13 - 03:17
But I'll tell you what... if you want to use my likeness...
03:17 - 03:19
for a Hamburglar-type character...
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I'll sign off on that, Mr. Banana-Grabber.
03:21 - 03:23
No, no, no, no, no. No more banana grabbing. No more car grabbing.
03:23 - 03:26
- Throw that away, please. - But it's already made.
03:27 - 03:30
I don't care. Nobody gets it now, okay?
03:30 - 03:32
- Are you happy? - My own brother, Michael.
03:34 - 03:38
My own selfish brother.
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- Michael. - All right.
03:44 - 03:45
I do not want you to get upset. He did not mean that.
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- Sometimes he says... - Selfish Michael.
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He did not mean that either.
03:59 - 04:01
Michael then went to his sister to find his father's car.
04:01 - 04:05
What car? I don't know what you're talking about.
04:05 - 04:07
Dad's car. The one you didn't tell me that you had...
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even though I had to ride my bicycle to work all week.
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Oh, Dad's car.
04:12 - 04:14
Well, obviously, I'm gonna use it if it's an emergency.
04:14 - 04:17
Lindsay had such an emergency three days earlier...
04:17 - 04:20
when her salon was able to squeeze her in at the last moment.
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That color's discontinued!
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I have to get ready for the bachelorette auction.
04:28 - 04:30
The bachelorette auction? You know you're married.
04:31 - 04:33
You just go to dinner with the guy. It's for charity.
04:33 - 04:35
That's what you said about posing for the Ladies of Literacy Calendar.
04:35 - 04:38
The one with the pictures of all the 30-year-old women in lingerie...
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with their nipples covered by copies of Oliver Twist.
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Yeah, that made a big difference for the young ones.
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It would have if it didn't get banned from the schools.
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Come on, face it. You do all this charity crap just to stroke your ego.
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You don't even know what the auction's for tonight.
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- The wetlands. - To do what with them?
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- Dry them. - Save them.
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From drying. Which is more than you would ever do.
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You're, like, the least charitable person I know.
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I don't do anything for myself.
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Everything that I do is for this family.
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Oh, you don't do it for us, Michael.
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You just do it because you love being the guy in charge.
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Cause you love saying no, like you said to Gob when he wanted a frozen banana.
05:14 - 05:19
And even after he gave you the rights to his Mr. Banana-Grabber character.
05:19 - 05:23
You know what? I will start doing my charity work when you start doing yours.
05:23 - 05:26
In the meantime, where's the car?
05:27 - 05:30
I think Buster has it. I don't know. It's on the schedule.
05:30 - 05:32
There is a schedule?
05:32 - 05:35
I always try so hard not to look at this thing.
05:36 - 05:40
- So Michael went to find Buster. - Who let you in?
05:40 - 05:42
- So Michael went to find Buster. - Who let you in?
05:42 - 05:43
Your new cleaning woman. What happened to Luz?
05:43 - 05:46
Supposedly, Luz had to take her daughter to the hospital.
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That's Lupe, her sister.
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- God, I hope she's okay. - She's awful. Can barely wash a dish.
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Uh-oh. She better not walk through here after she's been in there.
05:55 - 06:00
- Tell me you've got an exit strategy. - Mother.
06:00 - 06:02
- Tell me you've got an exit strategy. - Mother.
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Oh, please. They didn't sneak into this country to be your friends.
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Wow.
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Don't you judge me. You're the selfish one.
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You're the one who charged his own brother for a Bluth frozen banana.
06:14 - 06:18
I mean, it's one banana, Michael.
06:18 - 06:20
What could it cost, $ 10?
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You've never actually set foot in a supermarket, have you?
06:22 - 06:25
I don't have time for this.
06:25 - 06:27
I've got to get ready for the bachelorette auction.
06:27 - 06:29
You're doing that? You can't possibly tell me that you care about the wetlands.
06:29 - 06:32
I care about going for more money than Lucille Austero.
06:32 - 06:36
In fact, Lucille Bluth had made sure of that.
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- Lucille! - I got you tickets to The Producers.
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I already saw it in New York.
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But that's of no use to a woman whose vertigo makes flying a grotesque misadventure.
06:46 - 06:51
You must have scrimped and saved for these.
06:51 - 06:55
But isn't this the night of the auction?
06:55 - 06:58
- Is it? - You seem pretty confident.
06:58 - 07:00
Oh, I think there's a certain bachelor...
07:01 - 07:02
who won't mind coming home with me at the end of the evening.
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- Buster. - Where did he go?
07:05 - 07:09
Buster!
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Why do you hide every time the doorbell rings?
07:11 - 07:14
I'm not hiding. - Buster was hiding from Lucille Austero.
07:14 - 07:18
After inadvertently flirting with her at a social event while not wearing his glasses...
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Lucille had been pursuing him ever since.
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Buster, hi. It's me again.
07:25 - 07:27
I've still got those Producers tickets, and I'd love to share them with you.
07:27 - 07:31
I don't want you to think I'm taking this more seriously than you...
07:32 - 07:35
"are and unless you're planning some grand romantic gesture...
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my feelings are just the teensiest bit hurt."
07:40 - 07:43
- What are you going to do? - Bid on you.
07:43 - 07:46
- How much? - Ten thousand dollars.
07:46 - 07:48
- When? - When they call my name.
07:48 - 07:50
No, they're not going to call your name. They're going to call my name.
07:50 - 07:54
Good grief.
07:54 - 07:58
Hey, Busty. You been using Dad's car?
07:58 - 08:01
No. Uh, well, yes.
08:01 - 08:04
- You got the keys? - Uh, probably in my school pants.
08:04 - 08:08
- Okay. - I have been a part of this archeological dig.
08:08 - 08:11
- Hmm. - I think we found a part of a pterodactyl under Fashion Island.
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Be careful.
08:16 - 08:18
Oh!
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That was 90% gravity.
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It is my day on the schedule, but I guess you get them first.
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- Yeah. - Wait. I need my rape whistle back.
08:27 - 08:30
You got all your stuff out of the car?
08:30 - 08:32
Yeah, I left my, um, homework in the backseat, but I can get it later.
08:33 - 08:36
- Okay. - Okay.
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Help.
08:38 - 08:40
Michael surveyed the damage to his father's car...
08:40 - 08:44
the partially excavated skull, the spilled nail polish...
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the burned seats... and he came to an important decision.
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Well, I'm getting some ice cream... I can tell you that right now.
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Michael, now able to drive to prison...
08:56 - 08:59
confronted his father about the permits.
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How come you didn't tell me that you didn't file them?
09:01 - 09:03
I'm under a lot of pressure. I'm trying to get my newsletter off the ground...
09:03 - 09:07
and I'm trying to decide which gang to align myself with.
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- Is it pledge week already? - I've got it down to two...
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but, honestly, I just don't even want to choose.
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I just feel... I feel like the prettiest girl at the dance.
09:16 - 09:20
Listen, about that permit thing, that's an easy fix.
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just break into the permit office, slip the application into the next file...
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then you tell them, you know, "Hey, you guys screwed up."
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- I'm not doing that, Dad. - Michael, you lied to your investors.
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You gotta make that right. Call Gob.
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He'll handle it. That's what... That's what he's for.
09:36 - 09:38
That's what he's for.
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You better tell him I'm asking. I don't think he's gonna do it for you...
09:40 - 09:43
after you wouldn't even give him a frozen banana, Michael?
09:43 - 09:46
- What is there, a chat room that you guys... - That's not charitable.
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Never mind. I'll tell Gob that you want him to do this.
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- Okay. I got a dance I gotta get ready for. - Whoa. There's really a dance?
09:52 - 09:55
I don't know. Both sides are making a lot of promises.
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You should call this a Gob, guy.
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Gob, can I talk to you for a sec?
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Listen, um, I'm really sorry about before.
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I said some things, and I got a little carried away.
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It's not the way you're supposed to treat a brother...
10:21 - 10:23
especially one that I value so highly.
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- Oh, I need a favor. - That was subtle.
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- Did you just whistle? - I had to buy a candied apple...
10:31 - 10:33
when you denied me a banana, so, yeah, I'm whistling.
10:34 - 10:36
- Satisfied? - It's not that noticeable. Listen.
10:36 - 10:40
- Dad would like for you to break into the permit office. - Dad?
10:40 - 10:45
- Dad said he wanted me for that? - Yes, he did.
10:45 - 10:48
- Will you do it? - Maybe. I have some conditions.
10:48 - 10:52
- Terms. - Boy.
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- One condition and one term. - All right.
10:56 - 10:58
- Let's have the condition first. - Free banana whenever I want.
10:58 - 11:00
- Single dip. - Double dip, but I'll take one stick.
11:00 - 11:03
- All right. What else? - Creative control...
11:03 - 11:06
spin-off rights and theme park approval...
11:06 - 11:08
for Mr. Banana-Grabber, Baby Banana-Grabber...
11:08 - 11:11
and any other Banana-Grabber family character that might emanate therefrom.
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I retain animation rights, and we're gonna go back to single dip.
11:14 - 11:17
- Done. - Great. What else?
11:17 - 11:18
You humiliated me in front of my nephew.
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I expect you to fix that.
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I want the respect of your son.
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You better let me do the talking.
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George Michael, your uncle has a request.
11:28 - 11:31
One Bluth banana, George Michael.
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Go ahead, give it to him. Gob deserves your respect.
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And from now on, I want you to do whatever he asks you to do, okay?
11:36 - 11:41
After all, he is your uncle, and I think we ought to just embrace that.
11:41 - 11:47
- Thank you. - Have I held up my end of the deal?
11:47 - 11:51
I can't believe I gave you animation rights.
11:51 - 11:53
I hope that doesn't come back and bite me in the ass.
11:53 - 11:56
Meanwhile, Lindsay, wanting to prove to Michael...
11:56 - 11:59
that she was a charitable person, joined a group of activists...
11:59 - 12:02
dedicated to preserving the wetlands.
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Yeah. Hi. I'm gonna need a taxi.
12:05 - 12:08
I don't know if that smell is you, the car...
12:08 - 12:13
something you ate or something you're about to eat...
12:13 - 12:15
but my God, you're in a service business!
12:15 - 12:17
- Hello. - I'm in the wetlands.
12:20 - 12:22
I've got a poker thing, and I'm gonna clean them up.
12:23 - 12:25
So the next time you wanna tell me that I'm uncharitable...
12:25 - 12:27
why don't you just ask yourself who called you from the wetlands?
12:28 - 12:30
- Who is this? - Nice try. You're the selfish one.
12:31 - 12:33
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got some nature to save.
12:33 - 12:37
While Lindsay was finding it difficult to be truly charitable...
12:42 - 12:46
Michael was looking for an opportunity to rise to Lindsay's challenge...
12:46 - 12:50
and that's when he recognized his mother's fill-in housekeeper at a bus stop.
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Hello there. You're not riding the bus today.
12:54 - 12:57
Get in this car. I'm not taking no for an answer. Come on.
12:57 - 13:00
Don't make me get out of this car and put you in here myself.
13:00 - 13:02
- That's right. Here we go. - Unfortunately, the woman he picked up...
13:02 - 13:04
wasn't Lupe, but was a total stranger.
13:04 - 13:07
And upon seeing bones, a shovel and what appeared to be blood...
13:07 - 13:11
she realized he wasn't who she thought he was.
13:13 - 13:16
Mister, please.
13:16 - 13:20
This is gonna be tricky. I don't speak Spanish.
13:20 - 13:23
Yo "escared."
13:23 - 13:26
- Uh-huh. - "Izquierdo." I know that one.
13:26 - 13:29
Left turn it is, Mrs... They call me selfish.
13:29 - 13:34
Michael thought he was helping his mother's housekeeper...
13:35 - 13:37
- but he had the wrong woman. - I guess it would just be a guy who...
13:37 - 13:41
you know, grabs bananas and runs...
13:41 - 13:43
or, uh, a banana that grabs things.
13:43 - 13:46
I don't know. Why would a banana grab another banana?
13:46 - 13:49
Those are the kind of questions I don't wanna answer.
13:49 - 13:51
- Hello. - Oh, Michael, it's so beautiful here.
13:55 - 13:59
- You have to come down and see this. - I'm a little busy right now.
13:59 - 14:02
I've got someone else in the car with me...
14:02 - 14:04
and I'm not going anywhere until she's taken care of.
14:04 - 14:09
Look, I screwed up, okay?
14:09 - 14:12
I'm lost. And I hate them. I hate the wetlands.
14:12 - 14:15
They're stupid and wet, and there are bugs everywhere.
14:15 - 14:18
And I think I maced a crane, Michael.
14:18 - 14:21
Look, you've got Dad's car. Why don't you come pick me up?
14:21 - 14:24
Crazy. Loco.
14:24 - 14:28
Listen, we gotta make a little detour, okay?
14:29 - 14:32
So I hope no one's waiting for you.
14:32 - 14:35
In fact, the woman Michael thought was Lupe...
14:35 - 14:38
did have people waiting for her...
14:38 - 14:40
and they had reported her missing.
14:40 - 14:43
The real Lupe, however, was leaving Lucille's for the evening.
14:45 - 14:48
Buster, l...
14:48 - 14:51
Oh. Hello.
14:51 - 14:53
It appears my one-time admirer...
14:53 - 14:56
is not planning some grand romantic gesture after all.
14:56 - 15:00
You know what? It's his loss.
15:00 - 15:04
It's his loss. It's his loss!
15:04 - 15:07
Gob, meanwhile, was casing the permit office...
15:07 - 15:11
following the first rule of surveillance... never get noticed.
15:11 - 15:14
Carrier Express.
15:14 - 15:18
- Say, you're not our regular guy. - No, I'm the substitute.
15:18 - 15:22
Hey, Gary, get a picture of me with the new whistling delivery guy.
15:22 - 15:26
Gob realized he needed a new plan.
15:26 - 15:28
So, I need you to give your father a message for me.
15:29 - 15:31
All right. You heard my dad. I have to do whatever you ask me to.
15:31 - 15:34
Right. I forgot about that.
15:34 - 15:36
All right. Take this lock-pick set, break into the permit office for me.
15:37 - 15:40
- No, I think I better check with my dad first. - Well...
15:40 - 15:43
You're gonna break into a permit office? Sweet. Can I come?
15:43 - 15:46
And George Michael saw a chance to get closer to Maeby.
15:46 - 15:49
You know, my dad hates to micromanage. Let's just do this.
15:49 - 15:52
And back at the wetlands...
15:54 - 15:56
Lindsay finally found her taxi.
15:56 - 15:58
Oh, good Lord. You smell worse than before.
15:58 - 16:02
Oh, my God. It's me! - And in her haste to leave the wetlands...
16:02 - 16:06
she forgot to call Michael.
16:06 - 16:08
Hey. Hey! Stay there. What are you doing? Get in the car. Don't move.
16:10 - 16:15
Lindsay! Linds!
16:16 - 16:19
Come on. I'm tired of looking.
16:19 - 16:21
She's not here.
16:21 - 16:24
She probably never was here. She set me up.
16:24 - 16:27
This is probably all about the car. I'm gonna kill her!
16:27 - 16:30
Hey! Where are you going? Hello!
16:31 - 16:34
I'm trying to help you.
16:35 - 16:38
You're welcome.
16:39 - 16:41
Meanwhile, Gob met with his father...
16:41 - 16:43
to discuss the permit office break-in.
16:43 - 16:46
So I say to Michael, "If it's so important to Dad,
16:46 - 16:50
I'll look past your selfishness and do it."
16:50 - 16:52
There's a dentist in here who, uh, took liberties with his patients.
16:52 - 16:56
- I'm gonna ask him to look at whatever is happening with you. - Thanks, Pop.
16:56 - 17:01
Hey, my stock is never gonna be higher with his gang than it is right now.
17:01 - 17:04
Yeah. So have you, uh, made a decision or...
17:04 - 17:08
I don't know. I thought I had it down to two...
17:08 - 17:10
but then the Haitians made this beautiful pitch.
17:10 - 17:14
So, uh, any trouble at the, uh, permit office?
17:14 - 17:17
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Easy.
17:18 - 17:20
- I delegated, just like you taught me. - Who'd you get?
17:20 - 17:23
George Michael.
17:23 - 17:25
- My grandson? - Yeah.
17:25 - 17:27
You got my 14-year-old grandson to do this.
17:28 - 17:31
Under 18 walks out clean.
17:31 - 17:33
Listen, um, there's a very strict "no touching" policy here, but...
17:33 - 17:39
Oh, what the hell. It's worth a week in the hotbox.
17:39 - 17:43
- No touching! - You stupid ass.
17:43 - 17:46
And George Michael was successful...
17:46 - 17:49
- with the lock pick Gob had given him. - What are you doing?
17:49 - 17:51
We're supposed to put the form in the wrong file.
17:51 - 17:53
I know. I'm just leaving my calling card.
17:53 - 17:55
I thought we didn't want anyone to know we were here.
17:55 - 17:57
It's a little late for that. Our fingerprints are everywhere.
17:57 - 18:00
You said they weren't gonna check for fingerprints.
18:00 - 18:02
No. I said don't wear your mittens.
18:02 - 18:04
I didn't want you to look stupid on the security camera.
18:04 - 18:06
- There's a security camera? - Security breach...
18:06 - 18:09
Someone's coming. What do we do?
18:09 - 18:11
I don't know. I always get caught.
18:11 - 18:14
Save yourself. I'll take the hit.
18:14 - 18:16
My record's clean. I got my bike seat stolen once...
18:16 - 18:19
but I don't think it counts on your record if you're the victim.
18:19 - 18:21
There is a record of this, but it's not like I'm...
18:21 - 18:23
Thanks. I'll take the rap next time we do something like this, okay?
18:24 - 18:26
Next time.
18:27 - 18:30
Hold it!
18:30 - 18:33
And Lindsay made it to the Save the Wetlands auction...
18:33 - 18:36
- with moments to spare. - Hey, Mom.
18:36 - 18:38
Oh, honey.
18:38 - 18:40
You're not supposed to show up as the wetlands.
18:40 - 18:43
While Lucille was waiting for Buster to show up and bid on her...
18:44 - 18:47
Buster was waiting for the other Lucille to leave...
18:47 - 18:49
for what he assumed was The Producers...
18:49 - 18:51
but was now, in fact, the bachelorette auction.
18:51 - 18:54
And Lindsay was finally up for auction...
18:56 - 18:58
which Michael arrived just in time to see.
18:58 - 19:01
What do I hear for Lindsay Bluth?
19:01 - 19:04
Gentlemen, it's a good cause. - And as Michael looked at his sister...
19:04 - 19:07
uncertain whether her face was red from embarrassment or the sun damage...
19:07 - 19:12
it was clear she had been in the wetlands that day.
19:12 - 19:15
One thousand.
19:16 - 19:19
Seriously?
19:19 - 19:22
Sold... to the man who truly knows what charity is.
19:22 - 19:28
- And now, ladies and gentlemen, the lovely Lucille. - Move! Move! Move! Move!
19:28 - 19:33
- Who is the lucky bachelor... - And Buster showed upjust in time...
19:33 - 19:37
Ten thousand dollars!
19:37 - 19:39
- Buster! - to bid on the wrong Lucille.
19:40 - 19:42
How grand!
19:42 - 19:45
How terribly grand!
19:45 - 19:48
Well, how embarrassing. My own brother buying me? I'd rather die.
19:51 - 19:56
Thank you. Maybe you're not that selfish.
19:58 - 20:01
You actually went out there. I was impressed you gave it a shot.
20:01 - 20:04
Excuse me. Is this your car?
20:04 - 20:06
Yes. It's his.
20:07 - 20:09
- You're under arrest... - Ow! Ow!
20:09 - 20:12
for the forced abduction of Helen Maria Delgado.
20:12 - 20:16
What'd you do?
20:23 - 20:25
just trying to be a good guy.
20:25 - 20:27
Me too. Me too.
20:27 - 20:31
Let's go see Pop-Pop.
20:31 - 20:34
On the next Arrested Development.
20:37 - 20:39
Michael gets a lucky break when Helen makes the same mistake that he did.
20:40 - 20:44
- Four. Cuatro. - Four, step forward.
20:44 - 20:46
And Gob kicks himself for a bad business decision.
20:50 - 20:53
I never should've given up animation rights.
20:56 - 21:00